by Jay Moonah

Mr. Stir-Fry

I'm in a band, and I'm the guy in the band with the basement. (Everyone reading this who is or ever has been in a band knows exactly who I am in the band now.) Like all band basement rehearsal spaces, ours does quadruple or quintuple duty as a laundry room, camping gear storage area, work room, kitty litter and recycling space and, apropos to this column, pantry.

As it happens, I like Mr. Noodles. Now a lot of you are reading and thinking, "Gawd Jay, why are you eating that garbage food? That makes Kraft Dinner look like foie gras!" Our drummer agrees; every time he passes the small stockpile of Mr. Noodles in my basement, he points and laughs. And if the drummer is scoring off your perceived bad habits, you must really be doing something wrong, right?

Not necessarily. Here's the thing - I actually use Mr. Noodles as an ingredient in what I consider a pretty decent Asian-inspired noodle dish. It's quick as hell, tasty and noodles notwithstanding, actually decently healthy.

First take the notorious noodles and cook 'em up as usual; just follow the instructions on the pack. My little shortcut trick is to boil water in a countertop kettle, then pour that over the noodles in a bowl and microwave the whole thing for a couple of minutes. You can use the little flavor pack or not, probably healthier if you don't but I usually do. Now, while the noodles are nuking, cut up some of your favorite veggies and meat or meat substitute. For veg I like green and red peppers, various mushrooms, onions, sometimes tomatoes, broccoli, asparagus, basically whatever's around. Protein-wise, I tend to go for
chopped chicken thighs, pork, or textured vegetable protein (TVP) chunks. TVP is probably best known under the So Soya brand name '“ if you're using this stuff, just remember that you have to re-hydrate it ahead of time; again just follow the instructions on the pack. Season all these ingredients with a little sea salt and ground pepper.

Now get out your wok. Don't have a wok? Get a wok! I like the flat-bottomed non-stick ones that are basically like big frying pans, they're great for all kinds of tasks. Now use a little of your preferred cooking oil and get your wok up to a medium-high cooking heat
on your stovetop. Add your meat first (don't burn it!), and once that's cooked through add your veggies. You can add a little soy sauce or one of those fancy stir fry sauces at this point, there are some great peanut or plumb flavored ones you can get in any grocery. I highly recommend getting a couple of bottles of these, they make every meal a different adventure!

At this point the liquid from the veggies and the sauce is making the whole thing look a little like a low-grade stew. Here's where the noodles come in. Drain off the broth and toss the noodles into the stir-fry. Keep stirring! Those noodles will suck up a lot of the liquid, and you don't want them to fry to the bottom. A minute or two of this treatment and you'll have a meal even a drummer will enjoy.

Bon appétit!